“You tell ol' rich Mr. Chocolate Man that he ain't closing ME down!”

I never really understood people who claimed that others have tried to “keep them down.” Previously it was a concept that sounded so vague and weak that I judged those who used the term a little. I didn’t realize it at the time, but I was quietly judging. I, like others, am quick to “blame the victim.” I have little tolerance for those who appear to take an easy way out, use excuses, etc. I realize this makes me sound incredibly harsh (and I know I can be), but I am all about empowerment. I admire and respect people who carve a way for themselves. I think part of the reason I look up to those who appear to problem solve their way out of things is because I want so desperately to be one of those people. I want to be the person who has $20 left in her pocket, living out of her car and then is FORCED through such dire circumstances to invent the next Pinterest or Snuggie (come on, you know you kind of want one). Well, ok I don’t WANT to have just $20 and live out of my car, but I want to succeed so badly. I really do, and I, over the years, have come to feel like no matter what I do I just can’t seem to make it happen. The pieces don’t come together. Lately I am LIVING the phrase I have abhorred. I understand the concept! And boy is it a sour realization. There ARE apparently, always going to be people who do not want you to succeed for whatever the reasons. I have actually been so naïve as to think we are all sort of rooting for each other. There’s enough to go around, right?! Happiness and success and money and love for EVERYONE!! Well apparently not so much. Everyone is so fearful and insecure that they just want to cover themselves. Some people are SO QUICK to be defensive or negative, and I just do not understand why! Aren’t we all here for the same purpose? For god’s sake especially in my field! Education! Isn’t our ultimate goal to do what is best and right for those around us?

Betrayal was not something I was terribly familiar with, and then I experienced an unbearable betrayal from someone I truly respected and thought was a friend and mentor. After that I am wiser and see so many things differently. It takes a lot of courage to keep going strong. It takes a lot of strength to remain positive and driven. It’s not just those that have stars in their eyes- actors and musicians that need to keep dreaming, chugging along, hoping against hope. In this climate, if you have a dream- even if it’s just a dream to have a secure, rewarding job helping people in the field of education (you know, or whatever), you must keep dreaming and doing and trying.

SO! I will continue to keep my chin up, head high and to deal with everyone with grace and class, as my mother taught me to. I may be a bit of a Pollyanna but I will continue to hope for the best and despite some experiences expect the best from those around me.

All this being said, let’s talk about ‘made with love’- making or doing something out of love for YOURSELF! So whatever that is, do it. Occasionally I will make myself tea, lay out some cookies, and sit on my favorite chair in the early morning and read a book. It is such a delightful experience that I do not do often enough. Most of the time I wake up and read Facebook and Twitter posts in a horizontal position until I have to scramble and rush to get ready because I wasted so much time on mindless, unfulfilling nonsense. I vow to meditate by reading my book alone with my tea 2 times a week.

I encourage everyone to consider self-care to promote self-love… do something nice for yourself that you may otherwise wouldn’t do. Be it eating a cupcake, buying a magazine, getting your nails painted, watching a sports game start to finish with a drink in hand… whatever it is, make time for yourself. At the end of the day, despite having people who love and cherish you (and luckily everyone has a little of that), you must look after you. I am learning it the very, very hard way, but it is important to learn- not to be cold or cynical, but to be wiser and also healthier. I will continue to expect from others what I expect from myself, but when it doesn’t come together and I do not receive the support I crave and need, I will be sure to treat myself nicely and with a LOT of love.

Fatto con Amore

Wow, it sure has been a while... my first instinct is to apologize, but who am I apologizing to? And what's the point? Also, isn't a blog supposed to be casual? Write when you want and all?

I haven't felt particularly inspired to write this blog in the past few months. There have been many adjustments in mine and Bryan's lives, and dealing with married life and the things that can come with that, and joblessness and then having a job, and then adjusting to a job all took it's toll.

Anyway, I am now feeling more inspired as we have just returned from a long trip in Europe. It was originally supposed to be our honeymoon trip. The deal was that we would take a delayed honeymoon because the weather would be better in the spring/summer in England and Italy (our 2 choice countries), and also Bryan would be able to take 2 full weeks if we waited until the new year (2011) because he took so much time for all of the weddings we participated in last year (bachelor parties and the like). We actually took a trip immediately after our wedding- it was NOT planned, and was somewhat impulsive due to major, major, major airfare sales. So we went back to Chicago and also Austin, TX, but in our hearts Europe was going to be the real deal.

It was laughably not a honeymoon. But it was a good trip. We started out in London, which I remember being harsh from when I studied there one summer, but not as harsh as it was this time... I guess I should have known there was something of a dark cloud over our trip when the plane taxied the runway at JFK for 3 hours before even taking off due to thunderstorms. We arrived in London, and nothing seemed to work- our cellphones were SUPPOSED to work, but didn't and it took us over an hour and many wasted pounds figuring out why. Since our cells didn't work, we couldn't get in touch with the man whom we were renting an apartment from. So we sat in the airport for a few hours trying to sort that out (his phone number was in our phones, but on our calendars, which was connected to the internet, but since we had no service, we weren't connected to the internet, etc., etc.).

Anyway, we figured it out and got in touch with the person, and headed over to Notting Hill, where we were staying. We waited street side for this guy to come meet us. In true European fashion, he took his sweet time. P.S. London was freakin cold. So we are standing on the side of the street in MAYBE 60 degree weather (but windy and overcast), after traveling for nearly 12 hours...he shows up, unlocks the door, and proceeds to lead us up a flight of stairs to the room. Then another flight. And another. And another. Despite the cool breezes coming in from the windows, Bryan was pouring sweat as he lugged a giant suitcase (and I was lugging a smaller suitcase). We walked up 89 steps to arrive at.......THE SMALLEST, CRAPPIEST, DIRTIEST APARTMENT EVER!!! It was nothing like the picture advertised (hey thanks, Airbnb). It was not 2 rooms- a bedroom lofted "upstairs" and a kitchen/living room down.. it was a bed that was on a pulley system to be pulled down over the couch for sleep time. Awesome. No toilet paper, 1 towel. Random hairs everywhere. You had to step in the shower to open or close the door behind you. But what was done was done. Paid for (so expensive), and we were EXHAUSTED. What were we to do but try to make the best of it? So that we did.

Anyway, long story short, London had more of the same in store for us- rain, hail, obnoxious ferry boat captains taking off 5 minutes before departure time as we sprint towards the docks yelling for him to wait. We got to the boat (before departure time) while it was still docked and he decided to untie the rope as soon as we got there, panting. IT WAS STILL DOCKED AND WE COULD HAVE WALKED ON IF HE DIDN'T PHYSICALLY BLOCK US FROM DOING SO!(luckily, a competing boat company witnessed this monstrosity let us on their boat with no tickets).

Anyway. We left London (it wasn't ALL bad, by the way), and flew to Venice. We arrived in Venice and our bus broke down. At 11 PM at night. In VENICE, ITALY, where the majority of workers do not really appear to give a damn about ANYTHING. This is a place (Italy) where seldom things are open for business. I had an extreme need for a pharmacy during my time in Italy. Nothing was open. Fan-friggin-tastic.

But I digress. By the time we reached Venice proper (i.e. not the airport), it was after midnight. We had almost resigned ourselves to walking an hour, dragging suitcases across "quaint and charming" cobblestones when like a beautiful angel, a patron saint of travelers - a vapporetti (which is simply a boat taxi) appeared amidst the fog in the night.

From that point on, Venice treated us like gold and so did all of its inhabitants. It was a welcome change from cold, condescending London.

After 2 days in Venice, we were forced to skip town due to this huge art festival - La Biannale. All of the hotels were booked- ALL (which we knew beforehand so it wasn't a surprise or anything), so we decided to check out Verona since it has a great reputation. It was also on the way to our last stop, which was Sulzano (where Bryan's family resides).

Verona was underwhelming to say the least. It was very "touristica" as the kids in Italy would say... just fancy stores everywhere, not a quaint little village at all. The coliseum was ok, I guess, but during our time there a famous Italian rockstar was hosting several shows, so when we paid the admission fee to see the inside of the historic coliseum what we saw was a concert venue akin to Jones Beach Theater (sorry, the NIKON Jones Beach Theater, my bad). The only redeeming thing about that situation was that the rockstar was someone named Zucchero- please see link http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zucchero_Fornaciari. Bryan and I enjoyed google image searching him and repeating his name very dramatically throughout the rest of the trip.

We also had a few nice meals in Verona, where horse meat is a specialty. Since Bryan and I like to blend as much as possible when we travel and we try very hard to adapt and learn about where we are, we went for it. We ordered the cavallo. And let me tell you, after I separated myself from the fact that it was horse meat (which, I'll be honest took awhile and really only resulted in me eating 2 bites), it was DELICIOUS. Sorry, PETA. It was.

Ok. Onto the next Italian city! We met Bryan's cousin in Brescia, which is about a half an hour away from Sulzano, which is a town on Lake Iseo, a gorgeous lake in Northern Italy. Sulzano literally took my breath away. I don't have much experience with mountains (what with living in lower NY my whole life), but man are they majestic. The backdrop of the scene in Sulzano was just gorgeous. Beautiful mountains rising up above the water... colorful roofs (rooves?) dotting the picture. Oh my.

Bryan's aunt and uncle own an apartment next door to her son- she stays there when she visits him. So that is where we were able to stay. It was impeccable- clean, bright, had an espresso maker and that warm homey feeling you hope for when staying in someone else's home. What more could a girl ask for?

Ok. Let me get to the main reason I am writing this blog, and what has inspired my "Made with Love" posts and sentiment to reappear.

Each individual in Bryan's Italian family is unlike anyone I've ever met, but much like people I have hoped and dreamed of meeting. They are characters from a book or movie. They gesture when speaking. They give hard slaps on the back, tight hugs, and kiss you at least twice on each cheek. They are unassuming, and so genuine that Bryan and I would often look at each other just shaking our heads in disbelief (in a good way). They are so authentically what I pictured Italians to be, I could not even believe it.

So. We were introduced to the Italian way of life from a non-tourist perspective. They cooked most of their meals, and lunch is the biggest meal of the day. On our first full day, Bryan's aunt and uncle drove from their everyday home in Ossimo to Sulzano to see us. Giovanni got to work cooking up "pranzo" while Teresa, Paolo, Bryan, and I toured the gorgeous town of Sulzano. When we got back cooking was in full swing. I enjoyed watching the art. It was clear that every stir, every pour, every dash of anything added was done with love. It was spectacular to see the look of intent on the chef's face as he danced around the kitchen, towel slung over his right shoulder.

We sat for the meal and bowls were passed out, and giant spoonfuls of pasta were distributed. I noticed that the people I encountered in Italy (and London, too) (not just family) were extraordinarily comfortable with just being. They didn't have expectation or a self-consciousness that I find often comes with being American. They just do what they do and that is that. But these people were eager to please since we were their guests and please us they did. The main dish served at lunch that day was farfalle (bowtie) pasta with green olives and a sort of hotdog, sausage type meat. It was something that I would have never in a million years ordered for myself at a restaurant, but it was delicious. And call me cheesey, but I feel that the food I ate there was more delicious because it was made with such care and love.

The rest of the weekend continued in the same vein. Another meal, another showing of respect for food, family, conversation. Meals last for hours on end with multiple courses (I found that a course could consist of a single small piece of cheese).

On our last night in Sulzano Paolo came home late from work. Bryan's aunt, Bryan, and I were already eating dinner when he got home. Bryan and I were astounded when Paolo came into the kitchen, opened a drawer, pulled out a tablecloth, and proceeded to set the table for himself for dinner. This is a 33 year old unmarried man we are talking about. He took pride in setting his place, fixing up his simple dinner, and then enjoying his meal. It was such a beautiful thing to see. I know that people typically think of men as being more lax about setting a nice table and preparing a meal that doesn’t come from a bag or a box first, but in the past few months both Bryan AND I have been very guilty of not only eating take- out food, but eating it on the couch in front of the TV. Every. Single. Night. I’d be ashamed if I weren’t sure that almost everyone I know does this, and also that I am truly inspired to return to our old ways of making something simple and eating at the table after feeling that fulfillment that comes with have a meal without extra noise. There is already so much extra noise everyday all day. Why add more?

I’m also particularly inspired because most of my blog has been food related, and my new family does everything food related with a lot of love. I don’t have to make something I’ve never made before, or something with many steps. One night our dinner consisted of a vegetable broth and an apple (this was due to the fact that I got very sick eating the way they eat there. I’ll be more prepared next time but will also be able to say “basta” now that everyone knows me and there isn’t a chance of insulting anyone). But even on vegetable broth and apple night, we had a sincere and pleasant meal. It was delightful.

I look forward to sharing more adventures in eating and creation with you. I also look forward traveling more, meeting more of my family, and learning more about food and tradition, and sharing those observations with you as well.

Quilt with Love

This past September my sister, mother, and bridal party threw me a bridal shower that was fabulous. Well, actually the whole weekend was one of the best of my life. In lieu of a traditional bachelor/bachelorette type situation, Bryan and I and our friends spent the weekend out in Cutchogue, where we all rented a house and relaxed (and partied). Our friends Patrick and Liz, as well as my sister, bought and prepared all the food we ate that weekend. They did a TREMENDOUS job. Everyone was astounded by the delicious spread. Each meal topped the one before it. It was amazing. I especially enjoyed Saturday night’s pasta extravaganza. Patrick made homemade brioche croutons that make my mouth water to this day. It was amazing- truly. Something else I was so appreciative of was that most of the ingredients for the food they prepped and cooked came from places like Trader Joes and Whole Foods, so we were eating really high quality proteins and produce. I was grateful for that touch. AND lucky for me I have a lot of friends who do not think twice about lending a hand in the kitchen or with general clean-up. It was a real team effort, and I felt so blessed to have so many amazing people be around me at the same time.

At the bridal shower I received so many beautiful gifts. I was literally floored by everyone’s generosity- and not just with the gifts, but with the spirit that accompanied the day. Everyone seemed so genuinely happy. I basked in the warmth that everyone produced. I felt like I was glowing. There is nothing like the feeling you get when so many people willingly and happily come out to help you celebrate a milestone in your life. The only thing that compares was the actual wedding day, where I experienced more love in one place than I ever have before.
At the shower, my bridesmaids presented me with some group gifts- a basket of wine with a fun little poem that marked each new experience Bryan and I would eventually share, and the Pièce de Résistance… a handmade quilt with squares made by my family members and best friends. I literally burst into tears when I saw it. My dear, dear friend Meghan planned it out soup to nuts and was the driving force behind the whole thing. In her family it is a given that the woman getting married will receive a quilt with squares made by family members and friends, and while I do consider Meghan to be a part of my family, I NEVER expected to be included in such a tradition. Meghan’s family has treated me like their own and I love them as my own, but still, I just never expected to be presented with such a thoughtful (and time-consuming!) present. Everyone that made a square did it lovingly – it is obvious that they each thought carefully about what to put on the square and took the time to create an image or quote to reflect what they wanted to say. For those people who weren’t able to make squares, they used their words and the cards they gave me as a way to convey their feelings, which I still have and intend to make a scrapbook out of, as a complement to the quilt.

The quilt is hands down one of the best gifts I have EVER received. Every time I look at it I feel loved and cherished, and I feel like my relationship with Bryan is being celebrated. The quilt defines the phrase “made with love.”

Jams and Sauces and Pickles, Oh My!

Wooo it’s been so long! Sorry, readers. Lucky me, I got a temp job! Quality of life shot through the roof. It has nothing to do with health, but sort of something to do with education. I’m filling in for someone on leave at SUNY Farmingdale. I’m really enjoying my time there.

Anyway, the past few weeks have been totally crazy. Bryan’s grandpa got really sick and landed in the hospital, so for a couple of weekends in a row we went down to see him. The man is a miracle. He’s 95 and is so interesting and has a lot of enthusiasm for life. He’s really independent- he lives alone and drives himself everywhere. He just bought a new laptop and is reading books about computer software. I’m very impressed with him.

He and Bryan have a special relationship, so I’m really glad that we’ve gone down so much. We’re going to continue to make the trip every few weeks, and a serious bonus is that Bryan’s aunt, uncle, and cousins live down there too, and they are excellent company. Bryan’s uncle basically lives on a farm. I am so, so, so impressed with all of their hard work. They plant EVERYTHING and live in such a wonderfully sustainable way- they can and jar all their off-season produce, and they cook all of their own food (for the most part).

I was astounded by their pantry, and they asked us to come back when it’s berry picking season (apparently it’s still a lot of work, even with all the people down there to help out- his aunt and uncle have 3 kids, 2 of which have spouses and children of their own!). I could not be more excited. They kept warning us, but I just kept telling them that I volunteered on a farm for FUN. I went on my own time and picked strawberries ALL DAY LONG on a hot June day. And it was glorious. I mean, don’t get me wrong- I think farming is insane. I would be a nervous wreck if my livelihood were dependent on crops, but to be a part of something that is so much greater than ourselves- to connect with what makes us function (the food we eat!) was incredible. So I’m in heaven down there and I cannot wait for harvest time.

Anyway, they sent us home with 2 boxes of stuff- it was AMAZING!!!! They gave us homemade jam- strawberry (my personal favorite), a couple of kinds of grape, applesauce, tomatoes, 2 kinds of pickles, and tons of potatoes. They had the biggest sweet potato I have ever seen in my life. Another excellent thing about all the food they grow is that they don’t spray their plants- they don’t want to expose the little children who spend so much time out there to all the chemicals. When we last left them, they were looking into ladybugs as a way to control pests. I LOVE IT!

Anyway, it’s so clear that all of this hard work is done with a lot of love- they share what they have and they are happy to do it. They give food to their family, their church, and their friends. I'm so happy to be a part of this family. I’m really excited to be more involved in what they do.

PBJ English Muffin

Lately I've been feeling DOWN about things. I found out that NY legislation is part of the reason why I am having such a difficult time finding a job as a health educator. Apparently, NY doesn't recognize certified health education specialists (which is what I am) as health professionals, so there is a problem with funding from insurance companies, medicaid, medicare, etc. because services administered must be from "licensed medical professionals" but as I said before, in New York CHES are not considered to be licensed medical professionals. This explains why so many places have told me that if I was an RN I wouldn't have a problem and they would hire me. According to LinkedIn and the other CHES I know this is a huge problem - we are all competing with RNs, or actually in my case and for others in NY, not even competing- we can't get hired! Great thing we all spent thousands upon thousands of dollars on our degrees and professional development... nothing like being in debt and not being able to find a job.   

So anyway, if my bitter tone hasn't indicated it, I've really been struggling.

On Sunday I went on the computer for a while to do some job hunting. I'm taking a different approach by looking for jobs in different fields at this point, but it's still freakin' bleak out there. So I was getting more and more upset, and Bryan paused his TV show, patted the spot next to him on the couch, and got up and made me some tea and an english muffin. Now I know that we are total newlyweds, so we're still supposed to be in that stage where we constantly do nice things for each other, but Bryan and I have known each other since 2001. We lived together before our wedding, and we've been dating for a reeeeeeally long time. So we're not always totally in tune with what's going on with the other person. We're way past most newlyweds with some things. We definitely work at it. So this past Sunday was perfect timing for me, because if ever I needed someone to make me a cup of tea and an english muffin, that was the day. 

I sat, feeling really dejected on the couch with my head down on a pillow. I was a real sad sack. But Bryan marched in to the room, put a little toasted english muffin with peanut butter and jelly down in front of me, and I sat up, dried my little tears, and took a bite. For that minute, I had all I could ask for.

New Year's Day

Hubster and I celebrated New Year's Eve differently this year. Originally we planned a small get together with friends at our casa, but it definitely wasn't meant to be- several people were sick, and a lot of people had other plans. That was actually totally ok with me and I was excited to have a more intimate night and ring in the new year with my favorite. So we got super dressed up and went to a wonderful restaurant called Thyme, which is located in Roslyn, NY. They had live musicians that night and they always have a wonderful menu. Bryan enjoyed pork chops, a Mediterranean vegetable stack, and autumn fruits baked in puffed pastry and I enjoyed roasted chicken, creamy polenta, and sauteed carrots and green beans. We followed our meal with a jaunt to the ocean to ring in the new year with prosecco and with any luck some fireworks (a lot of people set off fireworks here in NY, especially down by the water). We forgot the wine opener, but we toasted with water. Slightly sad, but we made a firm deal to either open it when we got home or start the following day with mimosas. Somehow even without the prosecco, it was still a very romantic and lovely midnight :) 

Anyway, the next morning we awoke feeling relaxed and refreshed, which is the perfect way to start a new year, in my opinion (and believe you me, I've started a new year feeling howyousay? The EXACT OPPOSITE of relaxed and refreshed...). Anyway, the day before B and I made a trip to Whole Foods to grab some of Applegate Farms "Sunday Bacon" (SO SO good- thick, no nitrates/nitrites, slightly sweet yet salty, mmmmmmm), dessert for our NYE, and anything else we thought we might want/need for New Year's Day. We work really well in the kitchen together- for years I've served as his sous chef for certain recipes (i.e. ice cream, short ribs, coq a vain), and he as mine for others (anything you need to bake or juice, and family recipes). Cooking and food are things that we really enjoy together and are a big part of our lives. That is part of the reason why I love cooking for him so much. He really appreciates it, and it's something we can talk about and brainstorm together about. We're basically the Neely's but Yankee -style. No big deal. 

Anyway, on Saturday morning we started the day with a little prosecco and OJ as per our deal the night before. THAT was a delight. Then we got to work on our meal. Bryan prepped the bacon. We bake ours in a 400 degree oven for about 20 minutes. It's glorious. No dodging nasty little oil snipers. Also, you can make waffles, fruit salad, and eggs while the bacon cooks. Uh. Maze.Ing.

I was a little lazy and used a whole wheat buttermilk waffle mix rather than mix flour, etc. myself, but it was easy and tasty and sometimes that's all you could really want. So I made the waffles, Bryan took charge of the eggs- plain with salt and freshly cracked pepper (I love freshly ground pepper. Not too fine though- I don't like a light dusting of pepper, I want to really see the black flecks throughout my food). Before we knew it, bacon was done!

Assembled our plates, brewed a couple of cups of coffee, and settled in for a mini marathon of Friday Night Lights and Modern Family. Seriously, WHAT could be better than that?!! Happy New Year's!!

Bacon:

Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Line a cookie sheet with aluminum foil (makes cleaning up way easier).
Place bacon slices on cookie sheet- no overlapping! Bake in oven for 15-20 minutes, but turn each piece over halfway through (so after about 10 minutes) so that the bacon cooks evenly on both sides.

Scrambled Eggs:

Crack 4 eggs into a bowl, whisk them until they're broken up and stir in about 1 Tbs. of milk (we use non-fat). Bryan adds about 1 shake or pinch of salt and a couple of cracks from the pepper mill, too.
Melt a little bit of butter (1/2 Tbs.) over low heat in a frying pan and pour the eggs and milk into the pan. Use a spatula to constantly move the eggs around, folding them over until "desired doneness" (they aren't runny but not rubbery). Bryan also adds a teeny pinch of salt and pepper directly into the frying pan while the eggs are cooking.

Waffles:
I used 365 Organic Everyday Value Buttermilk Pancake and Waffle mix, and their recipe is as follows:
Combine 1 c. waffle mix, 2/3 c. plus 1 Tbs. of water or milk (I used skim milk), 1 Tbs. canola oil or 2 Tbs. butter (I used canola oil), 1 egg, and 1 Tbs. honey. Pour into hot waffle iron. Waffle irons obviously vary in terms of how you know when your waffles are done. Ours has a green light that switches on when the waffle is done.   

Lovely Lasagna

Hey ya'll.

Last week I made a delicious lasagna with homemade sauce. Hey, it turns out that homemade sauce is pretty easy to make! A couple of years ago Bryan's mom invited me over for what I call "Sauce Day." I learned how to make homemade meat sauce and manicotti. It was really fun, and I felt honored that his mom wanted to share her recipes with me. Bryan's mom is from Italy, and in my opinion she is very authentically Italian. She has the most beautiful accent, and many recipes in her house are written in Italian. I was very excited about Sauce Day (and also that Bryan's family is from Italy) because I've always admired the Italian culture (particularly the food!). My mom does, too. Growing up she was the biggest fan of Italian culture I'd ever met. It's really comical because her parents were from Ireland. Both my mom and I are 100% Irish; however, we've both always had a longing to be Italian, too. I joke that since I married an Italian, now I'm Italian, too! Anyway, I thought that learning some family recipes would be a good way to involve myself in my (now) husband's family and past (as well as learn how to make delicious pasta and meat sauce).

One of my goals is to develop my own recipes a bit and be able to cook things off of the top of my head. I'm excellent at following directions and have made many great meals from a cookbook or recipe card, but I feel that the art of knowing ingredients and procedure by heart is kind of dead. I would say that most people my age aren't able to put together a meal without the help of a recipe card or smartphone. Anyway, I've learned that people that are closer to my parents age have this skill, and when I ask them for recipes I'm told a story with little to no specific measurements or ingredients. Case in point- growing up my mom made homemade sauce, too, and when I asked her for the recipe it was, "You take some olive oil, put it in a big pot. Heat it up, add some cans of crushed tomatoes, then some seasoning. Let it sit. Add some more oil, maybe some cheese." You get the idea. Uhhhh, Ma! How MUCH? How MANY jars of tomatoes? What seasonings?!? What kind of cheese?! Ah! Same deal on Sauce Day. My recipe cards from that day are just paragraphs of suggested values... it was wonderful, but also funny to me-"some oil, then some onions or garlic, heat it up. Brown the sausage- lamb, pork, whatever, then take it out, put the tomatoes in, then some seasoning..." It was basically the same deal as my mom's directions except that it was a recipe for a meat sauce. LOVE IT! The manicotti recipe was slightly more precise, but not by much. Anyway, it was fun and everything turned out really well. Since then I've made sauce many times and it's fun to get my own version going which I feel like I can do since I was never given hard and fast rules about making a tomato sauce. I've found that many sauce recipes are kind of informal, and really depend on personal preference.

So I decided to let the sauce cook all day. If I recall, the weather was pretty gnarly so it was nice to stay inside with sauce simmering on the stove, delightful smells wafting through the apartment.

After a few football games the sauce was looking nice and thick. It was time to assemble. I preheated the oven to 375 degrees and got my dairy out of the fridge.

Sidenote- another one of my goals is to try to "healthify" recipes as much as possible without sacrificing flavor. This can be tough, but not with lasagna! Since I didn't make a meat sauce I decided to sneak some veggies into the lasagna. I used a package of frozen chopped spinach- let it thaw, drained it a bit.

I made the filling with a 15 oz. container of low-fat ricotta (I go for the all natural I really like Calabro. I feel like their low-fat ricotta isn't as thin as other brands, plus I've yet to see organic ricotta cheese anywhere. Whole Foods sells Calabro), 1 egg, and 1/4 c. grated parmesan cheese. I mixed a lot of spinach directly into the filling mixture. Note- you'll also need mozzarella cheese for the layering.

For the first time, I used "no boil" noodles. I was skeptical, but they were on sale and many chefs use them (well, the chefs on the Food Network do!). I used Barilla noodles, but not whole wheat (oftentimes I do- in my opinion lasagna is a good dish to use whole wheat pasta because there is so much going on and so much moisture that the pasta isn't usually the main thing- it's really an ensemble cast). I've heard that no boil noodles can result in a dry lasagna, but I think the frozen spinach helps the situation because frozen spinach retains so much water, even after draining it. So it puts some moisture back into the casserole. 

Anyway, I assembled the lasagna, and baked it for about 35 minutes. My sister came over for dinner, too. We opened up a bottle of red (we really enjoy a montepulciano d'abruzzo in my house) and went to town on the lasagna. Whaddya know? The no boil noodles were fabulous! The lasagna was the best I've ever made. Delizioso!

Sauce:


- About a Tbs. of extra virgin olive oil- enough to coat the bottom of a large, heavy stockpot or dutch oven
- 2 28 oz. jars of whole, peeled, plum tomatoes (or crushed, but I use whole and let them break up as the sauce sits on the stove. the result is a chunkier sauce. If you don't like chunks of tomatoes, you can get jars of whole tomatoes and put them in the blender, food processor, or food mill to break them up)
- 1 28 oz. jar of "no salt added" tomato sauce
- Minced garlic- about 1-2 Tbs. (2 cloves)
- Several dashes of dried oregano, basil, salt, pepper - to taste!


Heat oil in a large pot or dutch oven, add garlic. Pour 2 jars of whole tomatoes in, and let sit for an hour or so. (Note- you can literally make a tomato sauce in WAY less time- it is not necessary to let everything sit for so long, but I like to make a really rich, thick sauce AND I'm lazy about breaking up the whole tomatoes and the longer you let the sit, the easier they break up). Fill one of the cans with water and set it aside- you may need to add some water to the sauce later on, and you can get some more of the tomato in if you do it this way. Add some seasoning and let it cook. Add the jar of tomato sauce, fill that can with water and set aside (same reasoning as before). Let it cook for as long as you like on very low heat, periodically stirring and adding seasonings. It's basically done when you think it's done- however chunky you want it, thick, etc. My mom adds oil throughout so thicken it up, too.

Lasagna:
15 oz. container of low-fat ricotta cheese
About 6 oz. of mozzarella (you can use more or less, depending on your preference)
1 box of chopped, frozen spinach (try to get organic. The price isn't that different, and spinach is one of the dirtiest veggies)
1 egg
1/2 c. of shredded parmesan cheese
Barilla no boil noodles (haven't tried any other brand of no boil yet, so I can't recommend just anything without having tried it)

I switch between a rectangular 1/2 or 2 quart glass pan or a taller square pan- the taller pan means more layers and alters the cooking time slightly (takes longer). Start by spreading a thin layer of sauce in the bottom of the pan, then lay some noodles down. Spread the spinach ricotta mixture evenly over the noodles, then add sauce and sprinkle mozzarella. Repeat this process until you run out of noodles or it's thick enough. Personally, I like many thin layers. Bake for about 35 minutes or until the top layer of cheese is brown and bubbly. I add parmesan cheese to the top layer as well. Let the lasag cool for at least 10 minutes. Many times lasagna is better the following day because it sits for a while and firms up. Then you end up with a nice structured piece of casserole. Enjoy for the night or if there's just 1 or 2 of you, the rest of the week! Mmmmm.